Meaning of Marriage Week 5

The following post is from a series of small group discussion guides I wrote for my local church to go along with the weekend messages. The message series, entitled "The Meaning of Marriage" heavily referenced the book of the same name by Timothy and Kathy Keller. The book can be found at your local bookstore, and original message series can be found at vineyardchristian.org

The Meaning of Marriage: For singles and marrieds (Week 5)

OPENING PRAYER: God, you are constantly pursuing us. Calling us home to you. There may be times when we come home, and times when we are far away. But you are always waiting at the front door, ready to see us coming from a distance. You run toward us and welcome us home, no matter how many times we’ve left. Thank you for your mercy and your forgiveness, new every day. Amen.

This week, we learned about how the relationship we have with God is mirrored so closely with the kind of relationship we have in marriage. The Bible is full of examples of our relationship with God being compared with a marriage. The Old Testament prophets used it repeatedly, and the New Testament ends with an image of Christ taking the Church as His bride in the greatest wedding celebration ever.

Icebreaker: What is the most memorable wedding you’ve ever been to? What made it stick out in your mind? What is something you’ve seen in another person’s wedding that you wish you could “steal”?

This week, we’re going to take a bit of a “break” and look at a particular book of the Bible that was mentioned in this week’s service.

Hosea 1:2 “When the Lord began to speak through Hosea, the Lord said to him, ‘Go, marry a promiscuous woman and have children with her, for like an adulterous wife this land is guilty of unfaithfulness to the Lord.’”

As was often the case in the Old Testament, as a prophet, Hosea was asked to live out his life as a prophecy. Many times this might involve things like taking on a new profession, or travelling to some distant city. It may even involve naming your children by some strange name.(Isaiah named one of his children “Maher-Shalal-Hash-Baz”, meaning, "Spoil quickly, plunder speedily” as part of a prophecy. Imagine needing to put THAT on your papers in kindergarten!) Hosea, though, was commanded to build his entire family as a prophecy. In a land where the faithfulness of your wife and where great importance was put on being able to pass on your family destiny through your children, Hosea was commanded to take a wife he knew full well would not be faithful. In some translations, it’s put that she was “promiscuous” but it’s more commonly translated that she was a prostitute.

Discussion: What do you think it means that Hosea was commanded to take a wife like this? If Hosea is supposed to represent God, what does that say about us?

Next, Gomer, Hosea’s new wife, gave birth to children. We’re not told exactly how much time passed, but it’s at least indicated that these children may not really be Hosea’s. The first is named Jezreel. Now, this is interesting, because amongst other things, Jezreel was the name of a valley near Jerusalem. This valley was the site of many major battles, because of it’s natural position along some of the major travel ways between the various kingdoms that would come into play in Israel’s history, plus it was a relatively flat area that allowed for chariots as well as foot soldiers to do battle with each other in fairly large numbers. This was the site of many great atrocities as well as some of Israel’s more memorable victories. (It would continue to be the site of major battles for years to come. In fact, Revelation predicts a final battle there, near the city of Megiddo in the Jezreel Valley. The city is on top of a small mount, or “Har,” meaning that Jezreel was also often referred to as “Har Megiddo,” which became “Armageddon” in Greek) Gomer went on to have two more children, first a daughter, named “Lo-Ruhamah” which means “not loved” and another son, this time named “Lo-Ammi,” which means “not my people.” Each of these names were chosen by God and given to signify the status of His relationship with Israel at the time. God was essentially disowning Israel, not because He didn’t love them anymore, but because they had drifted so far away, worshipping other gods.

Discussion: What were some times when you felt truly far away from God? Did you feel like God knew how you felt? How did you come back? Have you ever felt like you couldn’t? What changed your mind?

Here’s the amazing thing. The thing that makes the book of Hosea so wonderful. (and one of my personal favorite Bible stories) Even as God talks about how far away Israel has gone, He immediately responds with how He’s going to bring them back.

Hosea 1:10-2:1 “Yet the Israelites will be like the sand on the seashore, which cannot be measured or counted. In the place where it was said to them, ‘You are not my people,’ they will be called ‘children of the living God.’ The people of Judah and the people of Israel will come together; they will appoint one leader and will come up out of the land, for great will be the day of Jezreel. Say of your brothers, ‘My people,’ and of your sisters, ‘My loved one.’”

Discussion: What’s it like to know that for when we are drifting away, God has a plan to try and bring us back?

After the children are born, Gomer runs away from Hosea. She ends up in some kind of slavery, and Hosea is told by God to go and get her back. He buys her both silver and barley and brings her home.

Hosea 3:4-5 “For the Israelites will live many days without king or prince, without sacrifice or sacred stones, without ephod or household gods. Afterward the Israelites will return and seek the Lord their God and David their king. They will come trembling to the Lord and to his blessings in the last days.”

God depicts through Hosea the image of Israel losing the very things that once connected them to Him, their priests and kings, as well as the things they used to push God away, their household gods and sacred stones. He paints a picture of reconciliation. As the book goes on, God lists Israel’s sins. How Israel was free and innocent when He found them, how He harvest them and brought them into freedom. Think of all the Old Testament stories, of God waging war with Egypt in the plagues, demonstrating over and over again how He had dominated the other forces in their lives. Think of when they came to the Promised Land and God smashed the defending walls of the cities and took on whole armies for them. And yet they kept drifting away. But over and over again, God reached out to them

Before we close, we’re going to read one more passage from the Old Testament, this time from another Prophet named Isaiah. The leader or a volunteer will read this passage, but please read it slowly. Let’s take some time to quietly pray while the verses are read and listen carefully to what God is saying. Put yourself in Israel’s place and think about what God might be saying to you.

Isaiah 43:1-7 “But now, this is what the Lord says—

he who created you, Jacob,

he who formed you, Israel:

‘Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;

I have summoned you by name; you are mine.

When you pass through the waters,

I will be with you;

and when you pass through the rivers,

they will not sweep over you.

When you walk through the fire,

you will not be burned;

the flames will not set you ablaze.

For I am the Lord your God,

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;

I give Egypt for your ransom,

Cush and Seba in your stead.

Since you are precious and honored in my sight,

and because I love you,

I will give people in exchange for you,

nations in exchange for your life.

Do not be afraid, for I am with you;

I will bring your children from the east

and gather you from the west.

I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’

and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’

Bring my sons from afar

and my daughters from the ends of the earth—

everyone who is called by my name,

whom I created for my glory,

whom I formed and made.’”

Take a moment and pray with each other individually or as a group. 

Closing Prayer: “Father, we thank you that no matter how far we may go, or how long we may have to come, you will always be with us. That we may stumble and we may even fall, but you will catch us so long as we stick out our hands.”